The build-up has already started – so many shopping days to Christmas we are told, present lists are being compiled by excited children and letters written to Santa. But if you are separated with children, you might not be looking forward to the festive season at all. There can be real stresses about sorting out the arrangements for seeing the children – but there are ways to make it easier. 

How to safeguard your child’s Christmas after a split

• Start thinking about it early. Don’t leave it to the last minute – put forward suggestions as early in the year as you can so there is plenty of time to negotiate if that is what you have to do.
• Try and put the children’s needs first. Ask yourself what do they really want to do? In many cases they are likely to want to see both parents over the Christmas period.
• Do you want to split the day – morning and Christmas lunch with one parent and rest of the day with the other? Or alternate years? Or one has Christmas Day and the other Boxing Day? There is no right or wrong answer, it is whatever best suits your family and their circumstances.
• If the children are spending the Christmas period with one parent, then make sure that they have ample opportunity to speak to the other parent. Agree a time for a video call. However much the children are enjoying the day with you, they may well still be missing the other parent.
• Be open to compromise when discussing with your ex. The perfect answer for you is probably not the perfect answer for them. Again, focus on the children and be honest with yourself about what they will want to do. Will they want to spend the entire day in their main home, or would they be happy to move from house to house if that means seeing both of you? 
• There may be practical logistical issues to think about. If the other parent lives some distance away, is it realistic to split the day? The children are unlikely to want to spend much of Christmas Day in a car when they could be playing with their new presents.

Whatever your circumstances, stresses and personal emotions it’s important to put the children first. That may be easier said than done, but it is beneficial and it’s why planning is go valuable. It may always be hard to agree Christmas contact with your ex, but the above pointers will help take some of the stress away.

DISCLAIMER: The information and opinions expressed in this article does not address individual requirements and is for informational purposes only. It does not constitute any form of legal advice and should not be relied on or treated as a substitute for specific advice relevant to your particular circumstances.